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docs/misc/bashphorisms.md
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docs/misc/bashphorisms.md
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# The Bashphorisms
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Bashphorisms are aphorisms for the IRC channel `#bash` on Freenode. Keep
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in mind that this version is a snapshot, the bashphorisms are changed
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here and there. Also, [another
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snapshot](http://mywiki.wooledge.org/BashFAQ/064).
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I think `greycat` was the first one who had the idea, but I\'m not sure.
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Our bashphorisms can be queried from `greybot` using `!bN`, where `N` is
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the bashphorism number.
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And yes, these bashphorisms reflect the daily reality in `#bash`.
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Number Bashphorism
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-------- ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
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0 The questioner will never tell you what they are really doing the first time they ask.
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1 The questioner\'s first description of the problem/question will be misleading.
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2 The questioner will keep changing the question until it drives the helpers in the channel insane.
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3 Offtopicness will continue until someone asks a bash question that falls under bashphorisms 1 and/or 2, and `greycat` gets pissed off.
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4 The questioner will not read and apply the answers he is given but will instead continue to practice bashphorism #1 and bashphorism #2.
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5 The ignorant will continually mis-educate the other noobies.
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6 When given a choice of solutions, the newbie will always choose the wrong one.
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7 The newbie will always find a reason to say, \"It doesn\'t work.\"
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8 If you don\'t know to whom the bashphorism\'s referring, it\'s you.
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9 All examples given by the questioner will be broken, misleading, wrong, and not representative of the actual question.
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10 See B1
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11 Please apply `(( % 10 ))` to the bashphorism value.
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12 All logic is deniable; however, some logic will \*plonk\* you if you deny it.
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13 Everyone ignores greycat when he is right. When he is wrong, it is !b1
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14 The newbie doesn\'t actually know what he\'s asking. If he did, he wouldn\'t need to ask.
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15 The more advanced you are, the more likely you are to be overcomplicating it.
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16 The more beginner you are, the more likely you are to be overcomplicating it.
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17 A newbie comes to #bash to get his script confirmed. He leaves disappointed.
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18 The newbie will not accept the answer you give, no matter how right it is.
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19 The newbie is a bloody loon.
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20 The newbie will always have some excuse for doing it wrong.
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21 When the newbie\'s question is ambiguous, the proper interpretation will be whichever one makes the problem the hardest to solve.
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22 The newcomer will abuse the bot\'s factoid triggers for their own entertainment until someone gets annoyed enough to ask them to message it privately instead.
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23 Everyone is a newcomer.
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24 The newcomer will address greybot as if it were human.
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25 The newbie won\'t accept any answer that uses practical or standard tools.
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26 The newbie will not TELL you about this restriction until you have wasted half an hour.
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27 The newbie will lie.
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28 When the full horror of the newbie\'s true goal is revealed, the newbie will try to restate the goal to trick you into answering. Newbies are stupid.
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29 It\'s always git. Or python virtualenv. Or docker. One of those pieces of shit. ALWAYS.
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30 They won\'t show you the homework assignment. That would make it too easy.
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31 Your teacher is a f\*\*king idiot.
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32 The more horrifyingly wrong a proposed solution is, the more likely it will be used.
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33 The newbie cannot explain what he is doing, or why. He will show you incomprehensible, nonworking code instead. What? You can\'t read his mind?!
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Please feel free to correct or extend this page whenever needed.
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docs/misc/readthesourceluke.md
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Comments extracted from the bash source and therefore Copyright (C)
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1987-2004 Free Software Foundation, Inc. under the terms of the GNU
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General Public License etc..
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from `mailcheck.c`:
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``` C
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/* check_mail () is useful for more than just checking mail. Since it has
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the paranoids dream ability of telling you when someone has read your
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mail, it can just as easily be used to tell you when someones .profile
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file has been read, thus letting one know when someone else has logged
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in. Pretty good, huh? */
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```
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From `builtins/read.def`:
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``` C
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/* If there are no variables, save the text of the line read to the
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variable $REPLY. ksh93 strips leading and trailing IFS whitespace,
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so that `read x ; echo "$x"' and `read ; echo "$REPLY"' behave the
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same way, but I believe that the difference in behaviors is useful
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enough to not do it. Without the bash behavior, there is no way
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to read a line completely without interpretation or modification
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unless you mess with $IFS (e.g., setting it to the empty string).
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If you disagree, change the occurrences of `#if 0' to `#if 1' below. */
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```
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from `variables.c`:
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``` C
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/*
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* 24 October 2001
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*
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* I'm tired of the arguing and bug reports. Bash now leaves SSH_CLIENT
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* and SSH2_CLIENT alone. I'm going to rely on the shell_level check in
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* isnetconn() to avoid running the startup files more often than wanted.
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* That will, of course, only work if the user's login shell is bash, so
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* I've made that behavior conditional on SSH_SOURCE_BASHRC being defined
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* in config-top.h.
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*/
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```
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From `shell.h`:
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``` C
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/* Values that can be returned by execute_command (). */
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#define EXECUTION_FAILURE 1
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#define EXECUTION_SUCCESS 0
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/* Usage messages by builtins result in a return status of 2. */
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#define EX_BADUSAGE 2
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/* Special exit statuses used by the shell, internally and externally. */
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#define EX_RETRYFAIL 124
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#define EX_WEXPCOMSUB 125
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#define EX_BINARY_FILE 126
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#define EX_NOEXEC 126
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#define EX_NOINPUT 126
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#define EX_NOTFOUND 127
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#define EX_SHERRBASE 256 /* all special error values are > this. */
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#define EX_BADSYNTAX 257 /* shell syntax error */
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#define EX_USAGE 258 /* syntax error in usage */
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#define EX_REDIRFAIL 259 /* redirection failed */
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#define EX_BADASSIGN 260 /* variable assignment error */
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#define EX_EXPFAIL 261 /* word expansion failed */
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```
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35
docs/misc/shell_humor.md
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# Shell Humor
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Nothing special, just my private collection of some more or less funny
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shell stuff I saw during the years.
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Usually Bash and/or Linux (GNU Toolset) specific.
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$ %blow
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-bash: fg: %blow: no such job
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$ ar m god
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ar: creating god
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$ touch /pussy
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touch: cannot touch `/pussy': Permission denied
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$ mount; fsck; fsck; fsck; umount; sleep
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# the lover variant
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$ unzip; strip; touch; finger; grep; mount; fsck; more; yes; fsck; fsck; umount; sleep
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# it's not directly funny, only because it's not obvious that this is an sed command
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# for the <<<, it works only in Bash
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$ sed streetlight <<< reeter
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lighter
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# see above for comments
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$ sed statement <<< cat
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cement
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$ \(-
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bash: (-: command not found
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$ echo '[q]sa[ln0=aln256%Pln256/snlbx]sb3135071790101768542287578439snlbxq'|dc
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GET A LIFE!
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